Lord Hwatta I have spotted the enemy! They are sporting a very stylish orange tunic with matching feathers. As you can see by the way they walk this latest fashion trend is sure to turn eyes. We are not sure who to thank for this latest fashion trend, but......

My troops are having beans and franks tonight in anticipation of the festivities to come.

Signed Oleg.. leader of the advance troops of the great and feared Hagar the Hun.

Lord Hwatta....

I have enguaged the enemy and soundly beat the hooves from underneath them. I am approaching the castle occupied by jeep. Resistance is slight. I will command my men to proceed with caution. This is my first encounter with jeep. I will test his skills of combat and report back to you.

Still no signs of Maloc. However I have heard rumblings from a band of traveling minstrials that he is in the land of ice and snow. Somehow that seems fitting.

I must end this letter as it is my turn to go for beer. I hope the local suds shop is open all night. I know you have told me not to keep my men up all night, but, the fighting for right now is being left to the local farm hands we have picked up on the travels north.

Hagar going for beer.

My faithful Lord Hagar,
I trust this correspondence will find you well and your troops able. I would suggest the Flying Harpy Tavern as a great place to stop in your neck of the woods and they have long hours with excellent wenching and beer! If you find a better place, be sure to let me know.

Everything is strangely quiet in the vicinity of my castle, but I am guessing it is the calm before the storm! My men are ready and growing impatient for battle to begin. They have destroyed many bands of bandits and rogues, but still await their first test in real combat.

All the best and down a pint for me. Regards to your men. It is fitting that they celebrate their victories, but in moderation.
Cheers,
H.

Hagar the Hun: *knock, knock, knock, knock*

Muffled voice of the proprietor of the Flying Harpy Tavern: "Sorry, we're closed."

"But your sign says you're open 24 hours?"

"Not in a row."

This is not a problem.

After bribing a local drunk for the secrete handshake we have obtained a brew produced by the local culvert dwellers. Tastes like old sandal thongs. I can't wait to get into castle jeep and some fine brew.

Hagar

i wish i had the talent to write such letters to me comrades, but sadly i dont
its really too bad this fight couldnt be a fair fight from teh start, but what i hear from sehti he sure did give u guys a run for ur moneyi hope to do the same, but plzz be gentle, its my first tiem in a long long time

I have met up with true_geordie outside of castle jeep. We are setting up a cricket match to pass the time while we wait for some more action.

Over half of my men are still drunk from the strange tasting brew. I have sent Oleg back to get more of it. It seems that it is very useful for sanitizing wounds. It also will start wet wood on fire with a single strike of the flint. But whoever lights the fire loses his eyebrows and all the hair on their arms in the flair up.

We are thinking of using it to start the palisades of castle jeep on fire.

Hwatta we wait your arrival. You are suppose to bring the marshmallows...... and you are late. You must be busy else ware.

Hagar with a hangover

WOA....What a party.

Hwatta Lord my, I thish that weerr havishing a goodsh thimne.

Sorry Lord Hwatta, this if Totish. My Lord Hagar has had a little to much to drink after entering castle jeep. We took over a training guild and found a stash of rum. The boxes were marked Private Stock of Uba Tuba the feared and dreaded pirate. We don't know who he is but, he does have good rum.

We have lots of troops in the castle and have yet to find much of jeep. A lady of ill repute said they were in a far corner of the castle. I don't know what they are all doing in the corner but we'll go look for them tomorrow.

We have sent out advance troops in hopes of finding some word of the where abouts of Maloc. Still no reports back yet. If some of the other clam mambers are in contact with him could you have them send us word.

Totish

Lord Hwatta,

I have seen the enemy and they are no more. I'm in castle jeep and the only people here are women. WOW! what women.

OH! Back to my report. jeep put up a valiant fight but, alas, as usual we have seen the foe and he has either fled like a coward or perished. In this case, jeep stood strong and perished. I do expect to see at least 1 or 2 hap-hazard troops show up before I completly control the castle.

Onward we march.

Lord Hagar,
Have you been letting the carrier pigeons have access to that "beer" again? This one arrived rather sick and wobbly.

This is great news in any case! Well done! Do not dally too long with the women. Speed is of the essence as we seek conquest of the CIA lands.

I plan to join the troops in the field as we will be facing combat soon. Morale is high and your news will improve it still more. Your timing could not be better!
All the best,
H.

Lord Hwatta,

When one drinks we all drink. However horses are slobs when the drink. They will, as my favorite author the late I. P. Freely would say, create, little yellow rivers. Ok for a horse it's a big river.

I will try to keep the pigeons out of it for I fear they fly in circles till the see someone and just land there.

HtH

Lord Hwatta my master Hagar sleeps after much partying and woman.

The troops are resting and we have hired some stable boys to watch the castle. During the knight they allowed some archers and scouts into the castle but have beat them to death with shovels. The column of knights has arrived but are tired from the long march.

We await your orders on where to go next. Are we to approach the boastful Maloc or lend support to rockhammer who is holding off both sethi and Cid?

Topah - scribe to the feared Hagar the Hun.

Lord Hwatta

I bring joyous news. Lord Death forces drove the curs Maloc troops back towards his ptiful stronghold only for my cavalry to cut down his men before they could reach safety.
Maloc has order his garrsion to halt our advance but his men are cut down before attacking our forward lines. As yet no sign of reinforcments from the rebels allies, we are expecting to find them cowering under their womens folk skirts.

As soon as Lord Hagar awakens from his drunken stupour we will storm Maloc castle. Lord Hagars breath will be of great assistance in melting the enemy fortifications.

True Geordie

How come the CIA keeps sending their soldiers to party at my place but they can't seem to make it past my Archer greeting troops? I have had the tables set and the beer mugs full for about 10 turns now. If you guys don't want to eat here just say so. I will save the food and drink for our victory party..

Lord Hwatta,

I have arrived at castle Maloc. The wall fell easily allowing access to the castle from a side route. (actually we threw some of the culvert brew on it and I breathed on it and it fell apart.) I also lost my horse as he also was in my breath range.

I do not like castle Maloc. There is only a few troops here. Nothing to slaughter, no women, no beer. No chips. I going to visit cid. If you are in contact tell him I'm comming. He had better have something to drink or I will burn his castle to the ground. I'll send a drunk pigeon his way.

Lord Hagar the Hun(gover),
You must take better care of your horses (and pigeons for that matter). We will have that new animal rights guild complaining to the emperor soon and you know how that turns out!

I am glad things went well at Castle Maloc and look forward to hearing more of your exploits at Castle Cid, although my hope is that your handwriting will be a bit less...creative...and easier to decipher. I do understand under the circumstances, and I'm glad you are on our side. The scribes have done an excellent job getting your messages out lately...you can always use them...unless you have breathed on them as well?!?

Things at Castle Sethi go as expected. Lord Sethi is leading a spirited defence and causing high casualties among my troops. His castle is well defended by well trained forces. We will prevail, but it will be a most trying task.
Yours,
H.

Lord Hwatta, my forces are moving into attack position. All opposition from Lord Cid has turned tail and run. The only forces from him that are visible are Commandeers which are being chased by Cavalry from our forces. My foot troops are moving into position to take over Lord Sethi's Northern resource structures. They will be ours in no time. Upon completion of this task my forces will turn in force against Lord Sethi's castle. It will fall under the combined might of our armies..
Lord Rockhammer

HEY!

If you guys are going to party at Sethi's I want to be there. He throws the best parties in the kingdom. His woman are fine and the beer is the best.

If you guys do get there first save me a red head. I'm talking about the beer.

Hagar

Party at Sethi's place. ALL Warlords welcome to come.. Bring your best as he only entertains the best quality of customers..

M'Lords,
The catapult troops got a little ahead of the plan and there is now one less barracks to hold the party in at Lord Sethi's Castle. I hope we don't show up with too many people or there might not be enough room for all of us. I think it was the barracks that had all the folding chairs and ballista in it!?!

I have sent orders to the captain in charge to try and keep those spirited troops under tighter control.
Yours,
H.